Why "The Greatest Showman" Has My Heart

I swear this will be the last post where I mention “The Greatest Showman”. Well, I can’t promise that at all. There may be several more. But I’ll try to hold back. It doesn’t help that my kids and the neighbor kids are doing a talent show with the soundtrack right now so it’s blasting from the basement and inspiring me. 

I haven’t really talked about why this movie affected me in such a strong way. So bear with me while I pour my heart into this post. Then maybe you can show me some grace in my obsession with Hugh Jackman “The Greatest Showman”?

Many of you know that I’ve been a stay-at-home mom since my oldest (age eleven) was born. That.is.a.long.time. When my youngest started kindergarten I started to take a hard look at my life, something I shoved to the side for many years. 

Who am I? 

What am I meant to do? 

What gifts did God give to me? 

What does He want my life to look like? 

Does my 1998 marketing degree translate to today? That one is easy, the answer: no. In one of my business classes in college, we spent one week on “The Internet”. True story, that’s how it was listed in the syllabus. 

This past summer - after a ton of praying, meeting with dear friends and soul searching - I decided to start writing. I can’t even tell you how much I love it. But to make a career out of it you need to have more than a love for writing. Publishers will hardly touch you without a social media following, a strong blog, a proven writing history or a deep friendship with a celebrity (read this Hugh Jackman!). I have none of these. And it is disheartening and something I didn’t expect. 

That’s where I was the first time I saw “The Greatest Showman”. Loving to write, but feeling like I don’t stand a chance in this massive world of writing talent and success.

This movie is about inclusion, never giving up and dreaming bigger than you think is possible. It was the music - the passion, the lyrics, the emotion that won me over. It all just moved me to my core. Thus, being on the verge of tears each time I saw the movie (at this writing, three times). 

Let me give you a few examples from the soundtrack: 

Track #2 - “A Million Dreams”

For the first time for as long as I can remember, I have a dream that I’m passionate about. That I love. A God-given, God-inspired dream. It is real. It is powerful. It is scary. I have a million dreams of a career that I love and am passionate about and if I work for it, they can come true.

My favorite lyrics, “I close my eyes and I can see, The world that's waiting up for me, That I call my own.”

Track #4 - “Come Alive”

This one is pretty obvious. After years and years of playing the role of mom and wife, it’s time for more. My heart yearns for more. God is pushing me toward more. It’s time to come alive!

My favorite lyrics, “But you can flip the switch and brighten up your darkest day, Sun is up and the color's blinding, Take the world and redefine it, Leave behind your narrow mind, You'll never be the same.”

Track #7 - “This Is Me”

I keep things pretty close, I don’t typically share my insecurities or my weaknesses or my hurt. But when I write, I do. I am transparent. I share what I’m feeling - my pain and my joy. It is what I love most about writing. I have spent my life trying to appear to be strong in situations where I feel weak, too proud to let my guard down. But when I write that all goes away. This is me. No filter. 

My favorite lyrics, “Look out 'cause here I come, And I'm marching on to the beat I drum, I'm not scared to be seen, I make no apologies, this is me.”

Track #11 - “From Now On”

When I hit my low point, I prayed. I asked - begged - God to show me what He intended for my life. It is something I had never done. I felt like I had a good relationship with God for most of my life, but it wasn’t until I put my whole heart into prayer that I felt Him pour into my heart. Almost as if we were having a conversation. It was beautiful and continues to move me. I never want to lose that and from now on I will move forward in God’s glory.

My favorite lyrics, “Let this promise in me start, Like an anthem in my heart, From now on.”

I could do this for every song. For me, every song touched my heart in a different way. 

There you have it, a glimpse into my showman obsession and an even bigger glimpse into my heart. 

Whew! That got heavy! Thank you for reading and following my blog to help me to “Rewrite the Stars” of my life (Track #8). LOL! I apologize - I couldn't resist ending with a cheeseball comment!

Until Next Time,

Neko